On Gay Clubs, Script Pitching and Falling for a younger man

“I said hey baby, let’s take a walk on the wild side”: losing my gay club virginity

I went with my friend Anita and two of her main gays, who I grilled with curiosity questions – obviously! One of them enjoys making out with girls just for fun which I found interesting (no we did not make out). I entered with visions of picking up a shiny new gay best friend (which I’m lacking)…But alas, I left empty-handed.  To sum it up in one word (okay two): WILD & FUN.

The Gay Club was like Britney’s “I’m a Slave for You” music video, only with some care bears and sparkly unicorns thrown into the mix. It was my first time going out with the expectation of No Pick Ups (which took the pressure off) and while I was surrounded by guys, it was very clear that none of them were interested in my offerings. The gleeful singing to Spice Girls and Aqua really brought this point home, although I was hoping for an outfit compliment at least. I also caught myself playing a game of “spot the straight dude” = impossible!

These boys were so free with their shirts off and dirty dancing, you could feel the sexual energy in the air and observe the art of seduction.

The takeaway:  let your flirty sexy side out when appropriate, and if you need any inspiration, hit up your local gay bar.

 
 
 

 

I am excited, yet stiff. This was one of the few shots with dudes in it.

 

“Pitch it like it’s hot”: a Screenwriting Contest

I attended a full-day film workshop (via Groupon) hosted by Raindance Canada which offers weekend courses on screenwriting and film making (they have locations in Montreal, Vancouver and London for sure).  After feeling socially awkward among my so-called (artsy) people, I met some cool dudes at the after-mingle pub party and we decided to attend this Script Idea Pitching.

31 brave souls took to the stage in front of 5 notable judges, including a random lawyer who heard about the event while staying at the hosting hotel i.e. a complete rookie. Oh and there was also two old man who acted like rebellious teenagers, heckling and laughing like they ran the show. Both of them pitched – I’m talking gray hair senior citizens. Well good for them I guess (am all about rambunctious seniors). I wish I took a photo!

Some were over the top, others were boring, others still froze completely but it made me feel like I may still have a shot at this thing (if I can stay disciplined and wade through my fear).

The feedback from the judges was insightful:

  • Get your audience to invest in the characters – that is the cornerstone of every screenplay.  
  • Think your story arc through and balance the big picture info, with smaller, compelling details
  • Know what kind of film this will be and who it will appeal to
  • Add some originality or a twist to earn bonus points
  • Complete at least a first draft of your script prior to pitching anyone because if they like your idea, they will ask you for a script and if you have one, you’ve made your life a lot easier.

I want to pitch my idea next year.

The Takeaway: you have to do the work and then put yourself out there to connect with opportunities (even if you feel like you will throw up/faint)!

“I want to love you, day by day, Pretty Young Thing”: Date a younger man? Sure why not…

I almost didn’t give him the time of day online, but was struck by the length and intellectual prowess of his rebuttal.

That and my mom is three years older than my dad, along with my my yia yia being 10 years older than my grandpa (click here to see her in action). So I didn’t want to be a hypocrite and also, at 21, Adele is incredibly wise and deep. She can’t be the only one.  

Thing is, I’ve met older guys who had their shit together and found them to be boring or I didn’t feel a spark or worse still, they came across jaded about life and were kind of oppressing. Ever since my big break-up, I’ve been attracted to “bad boys” and Mr. Energy fits that bill but has many more dimensions/facets.  

He’s missing some key “list items” and feels very risky to me because guys in general are less mature than girls and we may not progress and grow at the same pace, plus he likes to party and I am as wild as a plum. Then again, nothing in life is guaranteed – everything and everyone is a risk so I’ve decided to just go with it and promise not to kick myself in the ass if the probable happens. Plenty of Fish will be hearing from me either way.   

Because so far Mr. Energy makes me feel like the only girl in the room, is super affectionate and doting and we have fun doing anything, not to mention we have killer chemistry. It’s been 6 weeks and we are now kind of exclusive (I know!), which feels a bit weird since I’m used to total freedom and even though I was looking for this kind of connection, I didn’t actually think I would “seemingly” find it so soon.

So far it is teaching me to be less of a control freak and less pre-meditated in a relationship and I am being more myself, feeling accepted and trying to offer the same in return. Oh yea and I feel like I am 16 again around him, which really isn’t a bad thing. Taking things one day at a time and I’m pretty sure Alanis wrote this song for me.

The Takeaway:  Do something that scares you, like befriending someone younger and high energy – that energy will likely rub off on you and get you more in touch with your inner child and natural responses (instead of controlling them).  What risks have you taken lately?

6 Responses to On Gay Clubs, Script Pitching and Falling for a younger man

  1. Gina says:

    I love this line: “The Gay Club was like Britney’s ‘I’m a Slave for You’ music video, only with some care bears and sparkly unicorns thrown into the mix.”

    Gay clubs are awesome. If all I want is a night of good dancing without getting hit on by sleezy, drunk bar guys, to the gay clubs we go!

    That is so exciting you met someone! I, personally, have never had any luck with younger guys, but it sounds like the one you found could be a real winner! Chemistry is so important, yet so hard to find sometimes. It’s also fun when a guy makes you feel like you’re 16 again. That’s how “Chance” makes me feel. 🙂

    • Vanessa says:

      Hey Gina! So great to hear from you – I just caught on your blog today – the thing Chance made for you almost made me cry. I hope that the timing works out in the future for you two. Are you going to go to a gay bar in south korea??

      I know he’s a really interesting mix and very intellectual surprisingly while being immature. We’ll see but to be honest – it soooo felt like I had done my time. I wish everyone love, chemistry and squeeze tight hugs 🙂

  2. Just thought I’d let you know that another LIVE! AMMUNITION! Pitching contest is coming up November 15th. Elliot Grove is coming in from London UK to host.
    Thought you might like a heads up to polish off your script and practice your pitch 😉
    Hope to see you there,
    Tiska

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